By Jason Smith, Senior Consultant
Key Insights
- Grandparent relationships are often cultivated long before fundraising conversations begin
- Relational fundraising builds belonging and trust before generosity
- Involvement creates emotional ownership and long-term partnership
- Strong stewardship systems should support relationships, not replace them
Many schools already have deeply aligned supporters surrounding their mission. The challenge is often recognizing and cultivating those relationships intentionally.
Grandparents are one of the clearest examples.
They are already attending concerts, games, graduations, and school events. They are emotionally connected to the formation of their grandchildren. They care deeply about the future of Christian education and the long-term health of the mission.
Thoughtful grandparent donor engagement begins by recognizing that grandparents are often already moving toward the mission long before deliberate fundraising conversations ever begin.
You May Already Have What You’re Looking For
Many schools spend significant energy searching externally for future supporters while grandparents are already communicating deep investment through their actions.
This is where relational fundraising differs from transactional fundraising.
Transactional fundraising tends to focus primarily on appeals and immediate financial outcomes. Relational fundraising pays attention to people first. It notices patterns. It creates space for conversation. It values trust-building long before any significant partnership conversation takes place.
That approach deeply resonates with grandparents.
Many grandparents are not primarily motivated by institutional growth metrics or strategic initiatives. They are motivated by formation. They want to know who their grandchildren are becoming. They want confidence that the school is reinforcing values, faith, wisdom, and character in a culture where many families feel those things slipping away.
Research and screening tools can certainly support advancement efforts. But data alone cannot tell you what grandparents truly care about. Relationships reveal those things.
That is why grandparent donor engagement cannot simply become another communication strategy. It must become a relational strategy.
The Goal Is Partnership, Not Passive Attendance
Many schools unintentionally keep grandparents at the level of spectators:
- Grandparents attend events.
- Receive newsletters.
- Watch programs.
- Applaud from the audience.
But transformational partnership usually begins when grandparents move from simply attending the mission to participating in it.
At The FOCUS Group, one of the core fundraising principles is simple: people give when they are involved and have a sense of ownership. (See all of the Taking Donors SeriouslyⓇ principles here.)
What Ownership Looks Like
That ownership grows through involvement:
- Volunteering
- Mentoring
- Prayer gatherings
- Classroom participation
- Intentional conversations
- Personalized communication
- Invitations into meaningful experiences
These moments all build emotional and relational alignment long before deeper partnership conversations begin.
Belonging Before Generosity
One of the biggest mistakes schools make is assuming that generosity starts with asking.
In reality, generosity often begins with belonging.
When grandparents begin feeling emotionally connected to the life of the school, fundraising conversations become far more natural because the relationship already exists. The school is no longer simply an institution that their grandchild attends. It becomes a mission they personally care about advancing.
Strong grandparent engagement helps schools move beyond transactional communication and toward long-term relational stewardship.
Build Systems That Support Relationships
Strong grandparent engagement is rarely accidental. Schools that cultivate meaningful long-term relationships typically establish intentional rhythms and systems that keep those relationships visible and nurtured over time.
That may include:
- Thoughtful data collection
- Intentional stewardship practices
- Coordinated staff involvement
- Appropriate communication rhythms
- Consistent follow-up practices
But systems alone are never enough. A database cannot create relational trust. It can only help steward it well.
Systems matter, but they are only helpful when they support genuine relationships. The goal is not simply organization. The goal is thoughtful stewardship of people over time.
Begin with a Conversation
For many schools, the best starting point is also much simpler than expected: Begin with a conversation.
Call one grandparent. Not to ask for money or introduce a campaign, but simply to listen. Ask about their experience with the school. Ask what they hope their grandchildren gain from the experience. Ask what matters most to them spiritually, relationally, and educationally.
Meaningful fundraising strategies are often built through ordinary conversations handled with extraordinary intentionality.
The Relationships Already Around You
The schools that thrive in the long term are rarely the ones constantly chasing new names and families.
They are the ones learning how to recognize, cultivate, and steward the people God has already placed around them.
Grandparents are often not simply donors waiting to be asked.
They are future partners waiting to be known.
Jason Smith is a Senior Consultant with The FOCUS Group and brings more than 25 years of experience in ministry and nonprofit leadership. His background includes leadership roles with Young Life, where he helped develop leaders and strengthen teams in support of mission growth. Today, Jason helps organizations build meaningful donor partnerships that inspire generosity and advance lasting kingdom impact.
We’ve been privileged to help many organizations be more effective in their fundraising by learning and implementing relational fundraising principles in their work with donors. Want to talk?